"i think all this while you truly loved him only..so if there's any guy you want as your boyfriend it should be him"

If it was just crushes that I've been living through all these while..

Then I'm really sorry, Regrets..

I wish..I wish that he would notice how much that I've given up for him...How much I've..felt for him.

Thanks C.R. for..enlightening me. It was like I couldn't even see a few steps in front of me. Now, I think my path is clear. -Him- and -him- are just..'backups', distractions - hell, CRUSHES.

But him..him I really really like.

I don't think it's love. No..not love. Some thing more like a deep, deep respect for him and his skills, and his dedication and determination.

Sometimes I wish I could..talk to him in private. But we're always surrounded by friends, or noise. And I have to wonder if he has ever wanted to talk to me in private..because..I think..if I were to put a drastic plan into action, it would have to wait till after CNY..when I get to know -him- and -him- better.

And then maybe my path would be crystal clear. But I have a feeling that it's a crush right now for the 2 -hims-. I hope..not, and yet I hope so. Because I really really feel a lot for him.

"Dear God, the only thing I ask of you
Is to hold them when I'm not around
When I'm much too far away"

bounced at 5:21 PM.